This past Wednesday, I went out on a man-date with a good friend and client of mine to celebrate his recent promotion. Firstly, let me just say that I am in full favor of a weekly man-date.

As we’ve gotten older, the drive to go out to bars on weekends has kind of died down. Instead, I seem to find myself at more tame dinners with my boys during the week. Because we all have such busy schedules, it’s been harder to get together all at once, so we seem to be pairing off more and more often.

For some reason, this seems to draw some looks from other people at the restaurant.

What the hell? Can’t two young, exceptionally well dressed, exceptionally good looking guys with meticulously styled hair go out for a nice dinner without everyone assuming they’re getting naked together?

And for the record, seriously, I’m not gay. Just because a guy is neat, dresses in the latest fashions, takes care of his body, wears a lot of purple, hangs out mostly with other young good-looking guys, and has an impressive shoe collection, does that automatically make him a homosexual? I submit that it does not.

I mean, don’t get me wrong—some of my best friends are gay, and if I thought they didn’t want to sleep with me I’d be offended beyond words. Then again, I generally assume everyone wants to sleep with me.  That assumption is one of the cornerstones of my worldview.  It’s right up with the importance of Saturday morning cartoons and the sanctity of the 20-sided dice used for Dungeons & Dragons.

Anyway, like I was saying.

So there we are, two dudes sitting at a table having a very straight conversation about very straight topics, like football, fighting, and fitness. Although by “football” I mean soccer, by “fighting” I mean the argument I got in with my mom, and by “fitness” I mean the fact that I can’t get into the jeans I like because my ass is too big as a result of all my squatting.

Straightest conversation I’ve had this week.

As we’re talking–about business and fitness and all that–we wound up attracting the attention of two women at the table next to us. This was probably the result of our discussion about jeans. Or the references to my ass, which tends to get a lot of attention as it is. It’s quite nice, you see. Naturally, I decided to strike up a conversation with these two women, and in short order one of them referred to herself as “a classy broad.” Immediately, I knew she was cool.

Eventually, the waiter comes around to salt my game take our order, and I proceed to ask for the largest steak on the menu, cooked as rare as possible. These two women, having recently learned that not only was I a “fitness dude” I was also getting ready for a photoshoot, were flabbergasted. Fully. Their gasts were totally flabbered.

So, one of these two women—not the cute one, by the way—says, “must be nice to be able to eat that without worrying about getting fat.”

I groaned inwardly, and had a 5-second debate in my own head about whether or not I felt like getting into this conversation. She didn’t seem like she was trying to be an ass; she just honestly believed that red meat was bad for your diet—a pretty common misconception. I decided to be a nice guy (and maybe show off a little for her cute friend), and drop a little knowledge.

When it comes to dieting, most people seem to think that for dinner, they pretty much have two choices: grilled chicken, or lean turkey. This is probably more a matter of habit and old school thought process than anything else.

Initially, I suppose people chose these meats because of the lower calorie content. With both of these fowl meats, the overall fat content is lower than with even lean cuts of red meat. Turkey is the leanest meat pound for pound, in fact.

The idea, I guess, is less fat eaten, less calories consumed. Good general dieting decision.

However, a lot of the newer dietary research has shown that the other white meat, the other other white meat, and the other other other white meat pale in comparison (oh you better believe that pun was intended) to its bloody red counterpart.

Of all protein sources, red meat stands out for a number of reasons. Some of these are well known.

Firstly, let us get back to the amount of fat; quite high, when compared to chicken and such. However, this is not necessarily bad.

While it is true that the caloric content is greater, higher fat concentration also slows rate of digestion; this not only fills you up faster, but keeps you full longer. Consider also the (relatively) high concentration of dietary creatine, of obvious benefit. Not to mention the satisfaction of tearing Zombie style into an extra rare steak.

Moreover, there are slightly less well known benefits of red meat, one of which is has to do with the increasingly popular fitness buzz-term EFAs.

That is, red meat is rich with an Essential Fatty Acid (EFA) known as arachidonic acid. This particular EFA is a building block for dienolic prostaglandins, a class of hormones with profound physiological effects: specifically, an increase protein turnover and synthesis.

Obviously, when I said that, this sweet woman (who must have the patience of a saint to have let me babble so long) stared at be blankly. Not taking the hint, I decided to carry on anyway; because I am socially awkward, albeit in a very knowledgeable way.

Of particular interest to weight lifters, studies have shown Prostaglandin concentrations to increase subsequent to resistance training; researchers believe that the eccentric component is the most important stimulus, as the stretch appears to free arachidonic acid from muscle cells for synthesis of prostaglandins.

In short, higher levels of prostaglandins will allow you to maintain and possibly build more muscle while dieting.

I finished with a flourish (spilling water on myself, that is) and smiled in what I hope was a helpful, un-smug manner. I hope.

She thought about it for a second, nodded and said, “but what about saturated fat, and heart attacks?”

Bollocks. I knew this was coming.

Undaunted, I continued to spit my stream of fitness minutia everywhere.

For one thing, less than half the fat in red meat is saturated fat. For another, not all saturated fat is bad. The problem with most saturated fats is that they have been shown to be linked to heart disease when consumed in higher quantities.

That said, the main saturate found in beef is stearic acid—a saturate consumption has been shown to decrease plasma and liver cholesterol by reducing intestinal cholesterol absorption. Also, stearic acid helps to prevent arterial clotting and the formation of fatty deposits within the arteries to fight off heart disease.

Still, this woman seemed unconvinced. And little old me, all out of science.

Finally, I just said this. You know what? Fine. Maybe you’re right. Maybe despite all my sciencey talk, red meat ain’t good for me. But you know what? I don’t care. I love red meat. I love it with my belly and my heart and my intestines and anything else it might cause damage to do.

Even if you told me that you could 100% GUARANTEE that eating red meat was going to take 10 years off my life, I wouldn’t stop.

Seriously.

Honestly, those years come off the back end, anyway. I don’t want those years. If I die at 82 instead of 92, but I get to spend the next 40 years eating steak, well, screw it, I’ll take that deal.

As a matter of fact, if you said to I HAD to live till the ripe old age of 105, in perfect health, and die blissfully in my sleep, but I could never eat meat again, I’d pass. That sounds truly miserable. I don’t want to live another 80 years without eating meat. It would make me all kinds of sad.

Screw it.

Well, as you can imagine, that got her attention—not in a good way. Both women left shortly thereafter.

My friend and I, now bereft of our erstwhile female companionship, continued our very straight meal, and ate our very rare steaks.

We talked of many things. Mostly feelings and fashion and fruity drinks.

But seriously. We’re straight. We just kinda like shopping.

Not as much as steak, though.

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  • http://www.thenakeddish.com Sirena

    HA! Awesome post John. Looking forward to your top picks on “urban messenger bags”. So tell me, which Sex and The City character do you identify with most? I'm thinking Carrie…

    Good writing, very clever :)

    Sirena

  • Louise

    Ha ha, that was funny and informative…;-D

  • http://www.RomanFitnessSystems.Com John Romaniello

    @Sirena – Thanks! I think I'm a mix of Carrie and Samantha. Sam knows what's up, and she is kind of a what you see is what you get type of person. I like that about her, and I think I'm like that. Carrie plays too many games, and is kind of…ehh, I dunno. Unmanageable I think.

    On the other hand, she is emblematic of a certain resilience that I admire. No matter how many times she gets hurt, or how cynical she pretends to be, deep down Carrie has always been a pretty optimistic character.

    I admire that trait. So that's me–hopelessly hopeful.

    Not that I watch that show.

  • http://www.RomanFitnessSystems.Com John Romaniello

    Originally Posted By LouiseHa ha, that was funny and informative…;-D

    Thanks =) I'll try to keep'em comin. Don't get too used to it. I'm probably going to run out of funny long before I run out of information. I may hire Jonah Hill to write some stuff for me. In return, I will train him and get him jacked.

    By the time I'm done with him, people will think he's Eric Bana.

  • Dons

    I think there should be more man dates that don't have to be “tough guy” stuff… I personally like a guy who knows how to socialise with other men and dress well… dosen't make them gay… some people are so narrow minded! Good for you… as a wise person once told me, never regret anything that makes you smile.

    very informative also, great read.. one of the great things about living in Australia is kangaroo is so delicious and available in supermarkets, so lean, high in protein and low in fat…. great for the training!

    thanks!

  • http://www.RomanFitnessSystems.Com John Romaniello

    I agree completely! Thanks for the kind words =) I hear Kangaroo meat is actually pretty tastey.

    Is it more like buffalo?

  • Mel

    You are hysterical. Bollocks! I thought only gay men used that term…just kidding. Loved the post, feel the same about my Ribeye. Life is just a little bit better with a grilled ribeye. And shopping of course!

    Mel

  • Claire

    Christ you kill me. That was just so brilliant, witty and informative. Thanks. Claire

  • Brendan

    I guess the term “Metro-sexual” got over-used, and people shy away from it – for one reason or another. But hell, let's face it, there's a certain amount of vanity associated with working out and trying to build the best body one can – who doesn't get a slight ego boost as you turn heads when you walk bare-chested down a beach (even other guys)? We live in a world where appearance makes an impression – either positive or negative, and there's nothing to say a guy is playing for the other team just because he cares about what impression he's making. So, down with the macho bulls*&^t, up with shopping, good looking outfits, cologne and hair products!!!

  • Steve

    John,

    Great post and great humor. I can identify with what you said, except for the good-looking, great dressing part. At 57, I'm not as good-looking as I once was (although I'm still in great shape), and after reading Dress For Success years ago, I totally rebelled against the thought that people would judge me by the way I dress. Now, I know some people do, but I've decided to believe that they don't count.

    I love the story of the millionaire who dressed in his most ragged clothes to go buy a car. After leaving several dealerships because nobody would give him the time of day, he paid for a new Cadillac with $100 bills, making the day of the new salesman who didn't know better than to wait on him.

    I love your report and facts about steak. Long live the beef!

  • Deb

    @John Romaniello – Kangaroo is NOT like buffalo to me! But then I've only had buffalo in barbeque sauce and haven't tried that with kangaroo

    Also the “basic” cuts of meat seem to be different over here – I miss my good ole American meat. Nothing beats a good steak (beef) that is, cut well and cooked just right…

  • http://www.salyris.com Sean

    LOL! I am with you on eating meat! However, the benefits of all the good EFA's are in the organic grass fed cows. With that said, try having some flank steak, but tenderize and marinade it first. OMG is it good!! Even rare is it good! Nice and tender too, so you can take a junk of it right off the grill when cooking it! Yep, just had it yesterday as I am on vacation too in Miami.

    I get into these diet arguments all the time and it gets frustrating! It's funny though, I am very fit and they are usually over weight…hmmmm, and still arguing? WTF? You just want to tell them, “Hey, look at me, does it seem like my strategy is working?” Seriously!

    It all boils down to lifestyle and diet. Your body shows just what you are doing or NOT doing, period.

    Great post John! I can see why Joel is your best buddy, you sound like someone I could hang with too. Laughing make the time go by in a positive way and you get abs at the same time. LOL ;-)

  • Tony

    Dude, you're hilarious!!!

  • http://www.RomanFitnessSystems.Com John Romaniello

    Thanks for all the kind words, guys. Keep checking back, I have so many more fun blog posts planned, and I will probably even be subjecting you to some video. Which is going to be either really, really funny…or, well, absolutely terrible. In which case I guess it'll be funny anyway. Just not for me.

  • nadia

    What are your views on fish?

    Mercury is a trace element. Most of the research I've read, says the pros outweigh the cons. You wrote about fat content in white/pale meat other than chicken and turkey(fish qualifies). Omega-3 fatty acids in fish-oils are reportedly healthy. But maybe you have something new to share, just curious?

    um.. I am female and possibly lactose-intolerant, so fish seems to me, to be my best source of vitamin D (other than the Karachi/Tropical sun which I don't think is enough, since my mother is almost always in the sun, drank milk and ate yogurt regularly all her life but still has osteoporosis at the ripe age of 60).

    And well, my uncle made a huge fuss about contaminated fish recently, I looked it up online and found/'mostly read) that all the fishes in the world are slightly contaminated but still (I iterate) the boons shoot down the banes?

    Should I have fish once every week? If so, what kind?

  • Chris

    So, I knew about the beef, but learned something new: arachidonic acid. What, you mean it is NOT something evil?! YEEEHAW! But the good doctor Sears of Zone fame says “This particular polyunsaturaed fat may be the most dangerous fat know when consumed in excess and is known as an Omega 6 fat.” And that is why it's an Egg Whites Only Zone. Yuck. Which is the main reason it never worked for me. (Not bad otherwise). So – what do you answer to the charge that the omega 6 oils manufacture bad eiconsanoids, and are thus a big no-no?

  • http://www.RomanFitnessSystems.Com John Romaniello

    Originally Posted By ChrisSo, I knew about the beef, but learned something new: arachidonic acid. What, you mean it is NOT something evil?! YEEEHAW! But the good doctor Sears of Zone fame says “This particular polyunsaturaed fat may be the most dangerous fat know when consumed in excess and is known as an Omega 6 fat.” And that is why it's an Egg Whites Only Zone. Yuck. Which is the main reason it never worked for me. (Not bad otherwise). So – what do you answer to the charge that the omega 6 oils manufacture bad eiconsanoids, and are thus a big no-no?

    In all honestly, it's of minor concern.

    This is one of those things that tends to be cancelled out by other stuff. In this particular case, educated people do educated things.

    Most people taking the time to even consider the implications Omega-6 could have on their health are generally the same type of people who are going to be supplementing with higher doses of fish and flax oil, and other sources of Omega-3. When you have that stuff in place, you don't really have to worry.

    I don't want to trialize, but I will point out that the stressing of the dangers of Omega-6s in the Zone was pretty deliberate.

    If you look at the time the Zone first became popular, it was sort of an answer to Atkins. Sears has good information, but he was smart about and presented it in a way that made people second guess the safety of a diet like Atkins which proposed eating meat, lard, bacon, whale, grease and human flesh all day.

    The Zone took a greater focus on health as part of a way to position itself in the market and set it apart from Atkins. The discusson of Omega 6 was one way to do this.

    To some extent, 'demonizing' whole eggs and red meat–two staples of the Atkins diet–was motivated by the Zone guys to sell more books.

    Not to say there isn't some merit to the argument that Omega 6 fats are worth worrying about. It's just probably not something that is really enough to make avoiding meat (for that reason alone) worthwhile.

    Finally I'll just return to my earlier point – taking enough omega 3 (you ARE taking fish oil, aren't you?) usually warrants concern about this unnecessary.

  • Anny

    lmao! My tummy and cheeks hurt from laughing… yet I feel the tiniest bit smarter as well. Loved the story, must go eat steak now!

  • http://www.RomanFitnessSystems.Com John Romaniello

    Originally Posted By nadiaWhat are your views on fish?

    Mercury is a trace element. Most of the research I've read, says the pros outweigh the cons. You wrote about fat content in white/pale meat other than chicken and turkey(fish qualifies). Omega-3 fatty acids in fish-oils are reportedly healthy. But maybe you have something new to share, just curious?

    um.. I am female and possibly lactose-intolerant, so fish seems to me, to be my best source of vitamin D (other than the Karachi/Tropical sun which I don't think is enough, since my mother is almost always in the sun, drank milk and ate yogurt regularly all her life but still has osteoporosis at the ripe age of 60).

    And well, my uncle made a huge fuss about contaminated fish recently, I looked it up online and found/'mostly read) that all the fishes in the world are slightly contaminated but still (I iterate) the boons shoot down the banes?

    Should I have fish once every week? If so, what kind?

    Depending on how much you eat, the pros win this one.

    Most fish have some level of contaminant, but then most things we eat have some “negative” stuff as well.

    Unless fish is your primary source of protein, you probably don't have to worry.

    In general, I would say if you are looking to eat fish once per week for health purposes, salmon is the way to go. John Berardi actually got me turned on to canned salmon a few years ago, and I think for people on the go it is a nice option for getting some extra Omega3.

    To avoid merucry, though, definitely try to buy fish from more reputable places. Free range Alaskan salmon is a great choice. And if you are going to buy farm raised salmon, make sure you check out the place it's coming from.

    In most cases you are getting a good fish, with pretty low levels of mercury.

    As an aside, forgive me for the brevity of my response here, but I am actually planning on doing a full post on the benefits of fish, which will allow more people to get more out of it. This post will also adress the mercury issue.

    It will have a lot more information than I can provide here.

    Overall though, as you said, I am of the mind that the boons outweight the banes.

  • Arbel

    You recomend it too! Wow everybody recomends Prograde It must be revolutional!!! Man if only I knew how to obtain a credit card!!

  • Les

    Thanks Joel for introducing ppl on your mailing list to this closet fitness comic.

    John: Thanks for bringing a nice recipe of knowledge, personality, and humour to the table.

    I wonder if you and Joel could actually design a workout to literally laugh one's extra poundage on the derriere off, aka lmao? Hmmm.

  • Anouk

    Hey! I'm from Argentina so i get where you're comin' from. And you had me laughin my ass off 'til the end. A LOT of cool info too.

    Beso

  • Ricardo

    Well, well what a surprise , not much information but very, very funny. You are one of a few people to have used the correct reference for homosexuals. This remark is made solely on the basis of they hijacked the word GAY, how can anyone express that they feel gay today , of course meaning happy! O if you were told, that you only got a few days left if you keep eating red meat, would you give it up for a few extra months? Seeing that you love yourself as much as I do. Just kidding John. Enjoyed your blog very much hope to read more, that's if I give up red meat.

  • sal

    hahahaha, i think ur a mix of Sam and charelotte from SATC….great blog….i just recently started eating red meat again…for 5 years i stopped for all the negative media it gets…but last week i started eating it again…and im so happy…i can now eat a rare steak for the first time in my life….im so excited about this!!

  • Chris

    Thanks for the detailed reply. Sounds reasonable. I take krill oil now instead of fish oil, so I guess I'm still covered. Helloooohoo, beautiful lil' steak, hi there, handy boiled eggs with hummous!

  • http://soyoucantell.com Simon

    Funny and irreverent. Just the ticket.